comfort zone

Keeping Busy

~ mercyfortheday ~ Leave a comment

It’s been a year now since we signed on the dotted line for this retirement home. And we couldn’t be happier. Life is good. Oh. There have been adjustments all right. The man of the house lived in our former state for ten months before joining me full time in retirement. Now he’s busy taking care of projects around the house. He’s still adjusting to not having a strict schedule, but he’ll get there. It just takes time.

Looking back to my working years, I can now see how I never had time to do much of anything but work. But then, that seems to be the way the system is made. Forty hours of work each week leaves precious little time for much of anything else. Oh. We all try to squeeze in as much life as we can into those evening and weekend hours, but they’re never enough. And a few weeks vacation plus holidays sure don’t go far enough to ease the stress of a heavy workload.

But this year of not working has taught me something. I really enjoy having that extra forty hours in my week. I sure seem to find enough to keep myself busy. Sure. There are times I’m doing nothing. But there are days when I have a full schedule. Now. My full schedule doesn’t look the same as it did in the past. My day doesn’t start as early and it isn’t as rushed. I don’t always have places to go and people to see. But that’s just fine. I like it that way.

Here’s what I do know. In retirement, we can’t just sit around in our recliner and do nothing. Oh sure. I imagine that as old age creeps in, we’ll slow down. At some point, physical ailments and health problems will slow down some activities. But until those things begin to happen on a regular basis, we need to be active. We need to move our bodies and our brains. We need to engage in meaningful conversations with others, young and old. We need to volunteer and give back time to others who don’t have the time. We can start hobbies we never had time for when we were working.

At this point, I’ve discovered that retirement is a very enjoyable period of life. I hadn’t really thought much about what my retirement would look like, but I’m liking it. Over the past few months, I’ve begun walking most mornings. And I’ve become a pickleball player. I’m involved in a small group Bible study at church, and I’m starting to volunteer with the midweek children’s program. Oh. I don’t know the two people I’ve been assigned to work with. I don’t know the kids. I only know two people who are involved with the entire program, so I’m a little unsettled. But I’ll find my way. Does it make me nervous to get out of my comfort zone? Absolutely. Does it stop me? Absolutely not.

Whatever you do, do well. For when you go to the grave, there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom. Ecclesiastes 9:10

And the man of the house? He’s getting involved with a couple of men’s groups at church. One group meets for coffee early one morning each week. Oh. It’s a social group, but they’re building relationships and that’s mighty important. He’s also joined the men’s Bible study group that meets once a week. And he’s volunteering with another group to build beds for kids who don’t have one.

This man of mine. He’s also helping the next door neighbor burn down their huge brush pile. He says he likes to burn things, but he also has a huge heart for helping others. And he’s putting that gift to good use. Oh. He comes in the house sweaty and exhausted, but he’s doing a good deed for others who are still working fulltime. Every little bit of help makes a difference.

Here’s the thing I’ve learned. It’s easy to get into a rut and never do anything that challenges me. I could sit in my easy chair all day and scroll on my phone or laptop. I could easily sit and read all day. I could complain that I don’t know very many people in this new place that I willingly moved to. I could just do nothing. But that’s not what God has called me to do. I’m still healthy. I’m still active enough that I can help others and I can also have fun. And there are days that I don’t do much of anything. My goal is to accomplish one thing each day, large or small. At least one thing.

I’ve met a couple of people who moved to the area in the past few years, and they’ve told me that they don’t know anyone. Their method of meeting others is working out at the fitness center. But I wonder just how many people they meet there? Most people go there to work out, not to be social. I take it that they don’t attend church or volunteer anywhere. That would be a depressing way to grow old. Never meeting anyone or doing anything. Just sitting all day. I can’t do that. At least, not at this point.

It takes courage to get out of your comfort zone. And I’ve found that even though the nervousness comes around, it won’t kill me. I’m not doing anything dangerous. I’m just getting involved so I can stay active, meet others and build lasting relationships. I plan to grow old in this place. I don’t want to spend my final years complaining because I don’t know anyone when I haven’t done anything to meet others. So I’m putting myself in uncomfortable situations and plowing through that discomfort. Someday I’m sure I’ll see the bright side of my efforts.

Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ. Colossians 3:23-24

Discombobulated

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Several Sundays ago, I walked into the church sanctuary and saw people sitting in my row and the row behind mine. I call it my row, because it’s where I sit every Sunday. They weren’t sitting in my exact spot, but they were in my row. So I kindly asked them if the seats were taken, and they said yes. I moved one row up and sat down. They must be visitors, I thought. I had never seen any of the people sitting in those two rows, so I wasn’t sure what was going on. They seemed to know each other, because they were chatting away.

As the sanctuary began to fill up, I noticed the family who usually sits behind me was sitting across the aisle. Since no specific family sits in the row in front of me each week, I wasn’t sure who would be misplaced there. But the very tall family who usually sits two rows in front of me sat right in front of me on this particular Sunday. They’re giants. And I couldn’t see a thing.

I noticed other people being displaced to other seats that morning, as well. I bet they were wondering the same thing as me. Why is everyone sitting in the wrong seat this morning? Who are those strangers taking up two rows? Are they going to be here next week, too? Is this our new normal?

When it was time to greet people around us, I turned around and shook the stranger’s hands. I had no hard feelings, but I hoped they didn’t ask if they were in my seat. I wasn’t sure how I could say yes without being cynical. So much for being a gracious Christian.

Oh. I hadn’t planned to say anything to these strangers about the fact that they were sitting in my row. But I was thinking it, and I knew I was wrong. I wouldn’t say I had a bad attitude, but I was borderline.

At the end of the service, the pastor announced a baby dedication. Sure enough. These two rows of people were with the new parents whose baby was being dedicated. I must say I breathed a sigh of relief.

Ever since that Sunday, I’ve realized that a few families have intentionally moved from their usual seats. And I’ve wondered why. There’s no rhyme or reason for it that I can tell. Oh. Some of these families arrive just after the service starts, so they don’t always have a prime choice. But they’re now choosing to sit in a different section altogether. I don’t understand. What made them switch?

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. Proverbs 4:23

And this past Sunday, I’m not sure what was happening. Several people were sitting in rows they don’t normally sit in. Once again, I’m stumped. Because when one family sits in the wrong row, it’s a domino effect. Several other families and rows are impacted. It could get ugly, but I’ve never seen that happen.

Oh. I know these are trivial matters in the whole scheme of things. But sometimes it takes only one small change to throw someone into a very difficult mood. Even in church, these things happen.

But then again. My mind goes back to eleven months ago when I walked into that church for the first time. I knew that wherever I sat, someone was probably going to be displaced. Because we know that everyone has their special seat. And I’ve continued to sit in the same general area every Sunday. I’ve noticed that one couple who had initially sat a row or two in front of me now sit across the aisle. I’ve wondered on occasion if I’ve displaced them permanently. I’ll probably never know. She did introduce herself to me early on, but she hasn’t spoken to me since. Even when I ran into her at the garden center months later, she didn’t acknowledge me. Most likely, she didn’t recognize me. That’s what I tell myself.

Sometimes we just make mountains out of molehills. There’s nothing to worry about, but we catch ourselves stewing about what we say is nothing. But that’s not really what we’re thinking. And we allow that nothing to simmer until it’s something big in our minds. And we just can’t seem to let it go.

Why do we adults act like kids? Why don’t we just move on when we say we’re “fine” but we really aren’t? Life could be so much simpler if we didn’t let the little things become so big. Our hearts just aren’t in the right place. And we take things way too personally. Let’s act like adults. And if we call ourselves Christians, let’s overlook the small stuff and pay attention to the really important things. Life doesn’t have to be as difficult and awkward as we make it.

And, I have to be honest. As a woman, I notice this mainly in women. Myself included. I don’t see men getting bent out of shape about someone sitting in their seat in church. I don’t hear men complaining about someone ignoring them at the garden center. We women can be really petty and pretend to be godly at the same time. Don’t think I’m pointing the finger at you. I’m preaching to myself when I say this.

Ugh. Heaven sure looks sweeter all the time. At least I won’t be faced with these trivial matters once I get there.

Observations of a Church Guest

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So I’m new to the area and I’ve attended the same church for the past three weeks. The first week, the only person who said hello was the greeter who held the door open as we walked in. No one else said a word. I guess that’s ok. I don’t really care to be in the spotlight. I did fill out a card with our contact information, but no one contacted us.

The next week, I had just pulled into a parking spot when someone stopped their vehicle in front of me. I was afraid they were going to tell me that I couldn’t park there, but no. The man leaned out his window and asked what kind of music the church sang. Was it contemporary or traditional? I told him that it was only my second week, and I gave him my view of the songs from the previous week. He asked what kind of preaching they had, so I told him it was very biblically sound preaching. And then he asked how old the person was who preached. So I gave him my guesstimate. He said that he was in town for a quick trip, so he thought he would pop in for the service.

We walked to the building together, and he said he was in town picking up a part he had ordered. He liked to visit different churches when he was in a new area and thought this might be a good one to check out. He asked if I was new in town or just church shopping. He said he thought my impression of the one service I had attended would be more accurate than someone who had attended for years. Perhaps he’s right.

We split up when we went inside. He went to find coffee, and I went to find a seat. Later, I saw him sitting a few seats behind me in the opposite section, coffee in hand. He seemed to be enjoying the worship. Then as the service was closing, I looked back to find his seat empty. Who knows. Maybe he wanted to get a head start back to his home. Or maybe he didn’t enjoy the Bible teaching that day. Perhaps he didn’t agree with my take on the church. We aren’t all looking for the same type of church service.

I’ll never see the man again. I don’t even know his name. All I know is that he had moved back to Illinois in retirement to be near his family, as I have. And like me, he grew up on a farm but in a different area of the state.

This man was the only person to speak to me at church the second time I attended. And he was a first time visitor.

Do to others as you would like them to do to you. Luke 6:31

I was anxious to see if anyone would acknowledge my existence on my third visit. And shazam. I walked in the door, and the greeter said hello. Then I found my seat and began to get comfortable. A gentleman walked up and introduced himself. We had a nice conversation. Then a woman sat down in the row in front of me. She turned around and introduced herself, and said she was trying to do better at speaking to people she didn’t know. We chatted for a bit. Later she introduced me to the woman who sat with her. All in all, I met three people that morning. I felt like a rock star.

I like the church. I enjoy most everything about their weekly service. I find it to be a reverent display of honoring God. The music isn’t too loud or obnoxious. The expository preaching is very spot on. There are multiple Scriptures and prayers offered throughout the service. I feel like this could be a good church home. Time will tell.

I’m not exactly sure what I expect from a new church. It would probably be wise to visit others before we decide to call one church home. And perhaps churches don’t act overly friendly the first few weeks because they don’t want to scare off newcomers. But when do they start being friendly? Should the visitor make the first move? Granted. I’m an introvert, so making the first move is not easy for me.

Or. Do most churches abide by the three week rule? No laying claim to the person until their third visit, because they may not be looking for a new church. Churches shouldn’t try to draft new people if they’re only visiting for just one week.

All I know is that I’ll find a church that fits what I’m looking for and then look to get involved in some way. It’s an intimidating sort of thing for an introvert to do. But I’ve done other scary things. I’ve walked into interviews not knowing the interviewer. I’ve started many first days on the job without knowing a soul. And I’ve always gotten to know people over time. Some are still dear friends to this day. So why should a new church be any different?

I guess the moral of my story is that people who’ve attended a church for a long time should welcome visitors and guests. Your kindness will go a long way in making a newbie feel comfortable and welcome. I’m preaching to myself here, because I’m not known for my welcoming ways with newcomers. As I said, an introvert doesn’t usually go out of their way to be the instigator of much of anything. But perhaps it’s time for change. Perhaps this new move will make this introvert overcome her quiet ways and start talking to strangers in safe places.

Moving On

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Well. We’ve done it. We packed up and moved across two state lines. It felt like a hasty decision, but we have also felt the hand of God guiding the entire process. To say it all went smoothly is an understatement. We found a new house quickly and sold a house quickly. And now the settling in and unpacking of many, many boxes begins. Oh. If anyone had told me at the beginning of the year that we would be moving out of a home we loved and journeying over three hundred miles to begin anew, I would have laughed. But the joke is on me. And here I sit in a new house near family members I haven’t lived near for over forty years. It feels good. And it feels right.

I know that soon the empty boxes will outnumber the full ones, but right now the task of emptying them seems daunting. The first priority is to repair any plumbing issues in the house. Homes have a way of aging, just as people do. And they need regular upkeep and maintenance to run smoothly and efficiently. Oh. We know there will be more repairs down the road. The inspection showed some minor issues that need tackled, so we’ve started our priority list.

Moving on from a beloved home is an adjustment. We loved our home and hadn’t really planned to leave it, but we found over the past year that our life priorities were shifting. We decided to test the waters of relocating, and now we’ve done it. The move has happened. By the end of the week, we’ll close on that beloved home and continue settling into this a-frame we now call home.

After this move and downsizing, I’ve decided that I have no desire to move again. We’ll see if I can hold to that. I sure hope so.

The thing about this change that warms my heart is that the suggestion to move two states away came from my dear husband. He said it was time to take me back to my home state after living away from my family for so many years. I didn’t know that my heart was leading me back to this state where I was born, but the more I thought about it the more excited I became. This man of mine is a gem.

One of the most heartwarming parts of the move thus far was having my family members come to help us unload all the furniture and boxes. Being closer to them is a dream come true. But honestly, I didn’t even know it was a dream until my husband suggested it. And then I realized here is where we belong.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5

Now we begin the task of finding our way in our new life and home. New church. New doctors. New grocery store. New everything. It’s a much smaller town that we’re now in. A cornfield is our backyard. We moved from a city where we regularly saw wildlife along with freeway traffic. Now we’ll slow our pace and forget the headaches of stop and go traffic.

We’ve left longtime friends and church family, but we will always keep them in our hearts. And we’ll find new friends. A new church family. We’ll meet new neighbors. Starting over is daunting, but the excitement of the newness is within. I hope and pray it is an easy transition. We don’t know the road ahead, so we pray for God’s grace and guidance.

Sure. There have been sleepless night with all the planning and hoping and anticipation, so hopefully now peaceful sleep will find me again. But during this entire process, the peace of God has been a settling factor in progressing toward this change. The anxiousness has revolved around selling a house and packing up. Making sure all the moving parts move at the right time and speed. And hoping that nothing gets lost in the transition.

I’m looking forward to growing old(er) in this new phase of life. There will be adjustments, but change doesn’t hurt anyone. It’s just a fact of life, really. Most of us try to avoid change, but it’s good to embrace a good change every now and then. We are resilient people. But most of all, God is good and he’ll provide for every step of the way. I trust his guiding hand, and I know that he will carry us forward as we adjust to our new surroundings.

Worth Noting

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For so long, he’s been hailed a martyr. But now the tide is turning. Now he’s being called different names. The man who once cried out that he had a dream is now being mocked as someone unworthy of his own race. He’s now being judged by those who once called him one of their own. Many now want to destroy his legacy. Everything he stood for is at risk of falling by the wayside. All because those who have come behind him believe in an ideology that’s in total opposition to all he worked for. Oh. How the tables have turned.

Rumors of behaviors unbecoming of a family man have been spoken of him since his untimely demise many years ago. Those accusations, whether true or false, taint the legacy of a man who worked long and hard for liberty and equality for all mankind, regardless of the color of their skin. He dreamed of a land where his children could walk and live freely the same as any other child. He dreamed of a country that treated all skin colors equally. For he witnessed a separation and segregation of a people whose skin color was darker than acceptable to so many born of a lighter pigment. And he stood against it. Even as the higher powers that be were planning for his demise, he stood for his beliefs. And on one fateful day, a single bullet penetrated his body ultimately ending his life.

Other reports are now circulating that he stood for unseemly ideologies that have become popular today. Whether the reports are true or not have yet to been determined. But this man, same as anyone else, was far from perfect. Perhaps the truth of this man’s achievements and failures may never be fully known, aside from God who knows everything.

A newly minted statue memorializing the man was recently dedicated. But family members are calling the statue hideous. Unsightly. Dishonorable. Distasteful. They are not pleased with the rendition that someone was paid many millions of dollars to create. And thousands upon thousands of pages of secret files against him by those in top government positions have been uncovered. Many other pages are still being held under wraps. Some are afraid for the truth to come to light.

What was it about this man that would cause many to applaud, and yet others to tremble in fear? What was it about him? Was it only because of the color of his skin? Or, were there hidden truths that, if made public, could sway the course of history? How could it be? Will we ever know? Are we better off not knowing?

While this man wasn’t perfect, by any means, he led a movement that started a revolution. He planned and participated in peaceful protests that rallied against the discrimination of his people. Even after multiple arrests, he still stood for the same message of equality. His message never wavered or lessened. He stood courageously for the good of his race.

One wonders if there will come a day when this man’s statues will be knocked down and shoved into a corner, as so many others have in recent years. Has his time come and gone? Has this man now been deemed to be on the wrong side of history? Is it inappropriate to publicly acknowledge his contribution to society? Only time will tell.

Then Peter replied, “I see very clearly that God shows no favoritism. In every nation he accepts those who fear him and do what is right.” Acts 10:34-35

There are people who are trying to taint his legacy, but truth always stands. Even when others make false claims or bring one’s faults to the light of day, God uses willing, imperfect people of all types. This man may have been involved in sketchy activities in his day, but he also did some great works that are still applauded. His efforts should not be forgotten.

I wonder. This man who pushed for peaceful protests against injustice paved the way for the rest of us. What peaceful acts are we involved in that would cause the world to sit up and take notice? Do we dare to stand up and fight for religious freedom when there are those who would remove Christianity from the face of the earth? When other Christians speak for truth in public settings, do we stand with them? Or. Are we too afraid to be noticed, so we stay silent? Do we share the message of forgiveness and salvation freely to those who need to hear it?

If each of our lives were publicly examined, how many of us would be humiliated as we stood in the public square? How many of our noteworthy acts and words would be cast off, because of our hidden behaviors? No one is perfect. No. Not one of us. We all could be the next one on the chopping block if only our private thoughts were read aloud.

So. Why are we so quick to cancel others because of a word spoken in anger or misjudgment? Who of us would be worthy of even one statue in our honor? What accomplishments have been noted for us that will be remembered in future generations?

The good news in the matter is that we serve a God of redemption. He will forgive all our sins and never remember them again. He won’t remind us of our moral failures or indecent thoughts. He won’t remember the name calling or lies or murderous looks we’ve given. When he forgives our sins, he forgets them. He doesn’t hold our previous wrongs over our heads. Our slate is wiped clean in the eyes of God. Oh. He won’t build a statue in our honor, but he will prepare a place for us in heaven so we can be with him for eternity.

Speak Up

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The man was on trial for a crime he hadn’t committed. But there were those who were out to get him. They wanted him dead. So they brought trumped up charges against him. They had false witnesses testify at his trial. They wanted to bring him down at all costs. They hated him. They despised the work he was doing. So they lied. They insisted that he be killed. They didn’t give him a legal trial. His trial was held in the dead of night. They convicted him before the public knew he had even been arrested.

It was as if they were on a witch hunt. Pursuing an innocent man, because they hated him. They were jealous of this man. This night was not the first time they were looking for reasons to kill him. They had relentlessly pursued him. Watching him in the temple as he explained the Scriptures. Watching for any sign that he was breaking Jewish laws so they could punish him. But he was always able to get away. Until now. On this night, he was betrayed by one of his own.

The thing is. Jesus knew the prophecies about himself. He knew what was in store. He had quoted those prophecies to his disciples, yet they didn’t understand the meaning of his words. Until much later. Until those prophecies had been fulfilled with his death and suffering and resurrection. Then their hearts were opened, and they understood all he had said was true.

And when the high priest asked if he should be freed, the people demanded that a murderer be released instead of this innocent man. The people. The crowd who stood by watching had just days before been praising and worshiping this man as he rode a donkey down the street. They were waving palm branches in his honor.

But oh. How their hearts had turned. When he who had taught a message of love and hope was on trial, they didn’t stand up for him. They wouldn’t dare speak the truth. Because if they did, they too might be brought to trial. And their fate could be the same as his. So they stayed silent about the truth. They demanded that he be killed.

This man. This innocent man was Jesus. They knew him to be the son of Mary and Joseph the carpenter. His brothers and sisters were known to these people. So when Jesus began teaching a message that directly opposed the ancient Jewish traditions, some believed publicly. Others believed privately. Others doubted his message. And still others revolted against him.

Jesus never shied away from teaching anyone who would listen. And actually, people followed him from place to place. They were eager to hear a message that spoke of love and humility. They were hungry to hear a message that spoke of treating others the way they want to be treated. They were amazed that a man who looked like them could perform miracles. He could heal the blind, the crippled, the deaf and the diseased. He could bring people back to life. He could calm a raging storm. They wanted what he had.

But were they willing to pay the price?

When Jesus was arrested that night in the Garden of Gethsemane, his followers scattered. Suddenly, his message seemed a threat to their lives. If they were found to be a follower of this man Jesus, what punishment awaited them? Would they too be brought to trial in a back room away from the courts and be declared guilty by false accusers? Suddenly this man with unusual teachings seemed more of a threat to their personal safety than they were willing to accept. They must protect themselves and their families. They thought. So they turned on him.

During the trial when asked what he was teaching, Jesus told them to ask the people who heard his teachings.  He said he hadn’t spoken in secret.  His message was public knowledge.  He wasn’t trying to hide the message of salvation from the crowds.  He was speaking loudly and boldly. He never watered down his message or shied away from speaking truth. He knew the cost and he continued this work his Father had laid out for him.

Oh.  There were times when he asked others who he had healed not to tell who had healed them.  But that was because his time had not yet come.  He wanted to postpone his arrest and crucifixion until more people had heard the good news.

But he definitely wasn’t shy about spreading the gospel of salvation.

The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields. Luke 10:2

How many of us speak of our faith only in secret?  Only in the confines of our church on Sunday morning?  Or in our Bible study group? Or in the safety of our homes? Or with our Christian friends?  How many of us, instead of trying to win the world to Christ, try to shield our faith by standing silent in public? Even when we see and hear wrong being taught and applauded, do we stand silent? Or do we speak up?

I dare say that we’ve become too comfortable with keeping our faith to ourselves. We say that we pray for the lost. We give money so others can share the Good News. But do we put our faith on the line by speaking boldly about right and wrong.

Recently, I was talking to someone about current events. We were both disturbed by the way our culture is heading. This person mentioned to me that someone needs to do something. And I thought to myself. Why not you? Why not me? Why don’t we believers do something and say something? If not you, then who? If not me, then who?

Inside, the high priest began asking Jesus about his followers and what he had been teaching them. Jesus replied, “Everyone knows what I teach. I have preached regularly in the synagogues and the Temple, where the people gather. I have not spoken in secret. Why are you asking me this question? Ask those who heard me. They know what I said.” Then one of the Temple guards standing nearby slapped Jesus across the face. “Is that the way to answer the high priest?” he demanded. Jesus replied, “If I said anything wrong, you must prove it. But if I’m speaking the truth, why are you beating me?” Then Annas bound Jesus and sent him to Caiaphas, the high priest. John 18:19-24

You can read the full story of Jesus’ trial, crucifixion and resurrection in John 18-20.

Difficult Decisions

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It was a Saturday afternoon, and I was reading a novel. My cell phone rang, and I saw the name pop up. It was someone I had a business relationship with, not a personal friend. I wondered why he was calling me on a Saturday. I mean. After all. He didn’t work on Saturdays. I wondered if he had called my number by mistake, but I went ahead and answered. He let me know that he had resigned from his position. That means he was immediately out of work. Oh. He had a new employer. But in his business, once you resigned you were out. No chance to get any information about your former clients. No two week notice. Termination is immediate.

He didn’t ask me to move my business to his new employer. He couldn’t. But we scheduled a meeting. A couple days before the meeting, I began my research on his new employer. I mean. I trusted him enough to continue doing business with him. But I wanted to find out some information about his employer. Did I agree with their business? So I did some digging. Actually though, I didn’t have to dig. A link to an article on the front page of their website told me enough. It told me that I didn’t agree with their core values.

I could see from indications on their website that our beliefs and values didn’t align. Now I have a decision to make. Can I live with myself if I continue working with this man who now works for a company that stands for things I stand against?

I have to admit. A similar thing happened a few years ago. I had gotten laid off from an employer that I loved and trusted. Then I got a new job. After the first day, I thought I would love it more than the previous job. But by the end of the first week, I knew that I couldn’t work there. After going through new hire orientation and learning more about what the company actually stood for, I realized that I didn’t believe in the business my employer did. Oh. It wasn’t illegal. But from my point of view, it was an ethics issue. And I knew it. But, of course, I couldn’t say those words aloud to my new employer. Or I would once again find myself unemployed. So I kept my mouth shut and waited it out. A few months later, I did find another job.

How do I get myself in these situations? It’s important to have convictions that I must uphold. Because, if not, what then?

Difficult convictions call for difficult decisions which call for difficult conversations. At some point, those difficult conversations must take place.

But then I consider other companies I do business, even though I disagree with their core values. I can’t have private conversations with them. And the same afternoon that I received that phone call, I saw a social media post from a company I support endorsing something else that goes against my beliefs. What am I supposed to do? I have to do business with someone.

How do I live my convictions and not be hypocritical? Is there such a thing as a pure life? I don’t think so. It seems that everyone is compromised in some area, whether we know it or not.

How am I supposed to know where to draw the line? How am I to know which hill I’m willing to die on? How am I to decide?

The people who know their God shall stand firm and take action. Daniel 11:32

If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross daily, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but are yourself lost or destroyed? If anyone is ashamed of me and my message, the Son of Man will be ashamed of that person when he returns in his glory and in the glory of the Father and the holy angels. Luke 9:23-26

Honesty is always the best policy. I know that. Sometimes saying those honest words is very difficult when you’re saying them to someone you care about. You know those honest words may cause the relationship to end, and you don’t know how that person is going to take your message. Oh. They don’t have to take it very well, and you may not present it very well. But it’s always in everyone’s best interest, as you’re speaking honestly, to speak kindly. Because how a person handles difficult conversations says a lot about them.

Lots of words can be said. Emotions will run wild. People will become sad and upset. People may say things they regret. And some people, even though they’re being honest as the messenger, upon seeing and hearing the other person’s reaction, may cave. And they may say, well, maybe it’s not so bad after all. I can go ahead and do the thing I said I wasn’t going to do. I’ll go ahead and do the thing that goes against my conscience. Just to please a person.

And when we stop to think about those kinds of actions and the results of those actions, how do we live with ourselves? Which is easier to live with? Pleasing people? Or pleasing God? Because, basically, that’s what it comes down to. If I have a conviction about something, and I act on it and tell the other person that my convictions mean that I can no longer do business with them. If I cave just to maintain that relationship, what kind of message am I sending to them? What kind of witness do I have if I cave just to make them happy? They aren’t my God. They aren’t the one I’m going to stand in front of on judgment day to give an account of my life.

Sure. Its important to build relationships and take care of them. Friendships and strong relationships are very important. But the relationship that should be most important is the one that has eternal consequences. It’s the relationship that says, at the end of the day, that my heart is right with God. And that my actions are speaking for God instead of against him. At the end of the day, do my actions match my convictions? And if they don’t, why not?

These are the questions I’m having to ask myself as I face this decision. Do I continue doing business with this person or not? And honestly, deep down I know the answer. It’s just that he left the house in an awkward goodbye. And we all felt it. In fact, a few minutes after he left the house, he called and apologized for the awkwardness. Because he did not expect our response to his decision to change employers. He didn’t expect us to say we may have to walk away from doing business with you.

Honestly, I never expected that either when I first got his phone call. And quite honestly, I don’t want to quit doing business with him. We’ve built up a strong relationship with the man. We trust him. Now, if we choose to go with another business, we have to start over with someone new. We have to develop trust, because it’s a relationship that requires trust in the person making decisions for you.

Consider the biblical principles for which the martyrs of the Reformation stood to the death.

Now consider the biblical principles about which we say, “Meh. No big deal.”

Michelle Lesley

I see more difficult decisions coming ahead for me in the near future. With different people. As I have other decisions to make. Other plans to make. And it’s hard. It’s hard to speak the truth when you know it may offend others. It’s never the point. It’s never my point to offend others. If I don’t stand for truth. If I don’t stand for my convictions, no one else will. Because they’re my convictions.

I have to live my life pleasing God, not pleasing people. Doing the right thing doesn’t always make you popular. Speaking truth doesn’t always make you popular. In fact, nowadays, it’s quite the opposite. Truth is lies and lies are truth. Right is wrong and wrong is right. Good is bad and bad is good. There’s so much of that going on that we feel like we have to silently protect our convictions.

I read articles and I watch videos of people who have stood for the right thing. They have stood for their beliefs. Some of them have lost jobs. Some have lost social positions. Some have lost friends. Money. Possessions. Just because they dared to speak the truth, in a world that has diluted the truth. And when you dilute the truth, it is no longer truth.

There are a lot of gray areas in life, but truth is black and white. It’s either right or wrong. Good or bad. Left or right. Up or down. We’ve been told that the truth will set you free, but how many times today does it bind up people? The recipients of truth today are binding it up, making truth look ugly and undesirable. And those speaking the truth are sometimes bound to be persecuted and canceled, because this culture is a selfish one. We want what we want. And we want it our way. And we want it now.

So I have decisions to make. And I’ve been much in prayer, because I want to make the right decision. I don’t want to make a snap decision, but I also don’t want to postpone it indefinitely. So my prayer is that God opens the right doors, closes others, gives me discernment and wisdom to know right from wrong. That he will give me the ability to speak truth in a way that is kind and honorable. And that I do the right thing. In God’s eyes.

Stand Up

~ mercyfortheday ~ Leave a comment

The story is all over the news. I’ve read the account. I’ve watched the video. A black man was killed by a white cop. The video shows her saying she was going to taze him. Instead. She pulled out her service weapon and shot him. He did not survive. Two lives changed forever. Two families changed forever. Another city filled with rioting and violence. Some say the shooting was a misjudgment. Others say it was intentional. She’s already lost her job and been charged with a crime. Both families are in mourning.

There’s another person in the story who is trying to keep their head down. They’re trying to keep the focus off themselves. Initially, the city manager boldly and publicly stated that there would be due process in investigating the incident. But the mayor didn’t agree. So the city manager and the police officer have both lost their jobs. But these aren’t the individuals who are trying to lay low. They’ve already been laid low. They’ve been placed in a position they never thought they would be.

One of the council members said she felt the city manager was doing a great job. She liked his work. But when asked to vote whether he should lose his job or not, she voted to remove him. She placed her vote against him, because she was afraid she would be personally targeted if she agreed with him. She didn’t want rioting and persecution on her home front. So she voted to fire him. Even though he was just doing his job. Even though he had done nothing wrong. She voted to get rid of him, because her approval of him would bring unnecessary, unwanted attention on her. Apparently, she disagrees with due process.

Here’s the thing. She thought he was doing his job well. She supported his work. But in his moment of need. When he was doing what the law allowed him to do by giving his police officer a fighting chance to tell her side of the story. She voted no. This council member instead voted to protect herself. Her well being was more important than anyone else’s.

Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant. Galatians 1:10

I read another story this week. It was about a man named Peter who had been traveling from city to city preaching the good news of Jesus Christ, the promised Messiah. He was telling others that this Jesus was the Son of God who died on the cross and rose to live again. He was sharing this story in all the Jewish towns. And then one day as he waited for lunch, he had a vision. As a Jew, he only ate certain animals that were considered clean. But God showed him in this vision that nothing was off limits. He could eat any meat he chose. As he came out of the trance, visitors knocked on the door.

A man named Cornelius lived in a nearby city, and also had a visit from God. God instructed him to invite this Jew into his home to hear the good news that he had previously only been sharing with Jews. He sent for Peter, who had just seen a vision from God. And Peter realized that God was telling him that the good news of salvation was for everyone, not just for the Jews. So he went to the nearby city and shared the story of salvation with Cornelius and those in his household.

What if Peter had said no? What if he said that he was afraid for his personal safety and wanted nothing to do with sharing the truth of God’s love to anyone in need? What if Peter had refused? What if he hadn’t obeyed God? The Gentiles, those who weren’t Jews, wouldn’t have heard the story of salvation.

Peter’s obedience and willingness to move outside his comfort zone opened the message to a lost group of people. His faithfulness in sharing God’s message of love and forgivenesss brought salvation to anyone who was not a Jew.

I wonder. How often do we keep quiet or vote for our own comfort, when we have the opportunity to stand up for truth and reason? How often do we put someone else’s need before our own?

Don’t we realize that there is someone else standing in the fire with us? There is someone parting the seas for us to walk through? Even during times of testing and persecution, God is with us. He never leaves our side. We must keep our eyes on him. 

Even when we are uncertain about what lies ahead, we know who is holding our hand. And we walk forward regardless of the consequences. Sometimes doing the tough thing is the best thing we can do.

The Gift of Obedience

~ mercyfortheday ~ Leave a comment

It’s a comfortable life she has. Money to buy the things she wants. She travels a little. Has a great family. Oh. Life isn’t perfect, but it’s pretty good. She loves God. She wants to obey him. She has taught her kids to trust God. To depend on him. To call on him in times of need. To thank him for his goodness.

God has gifted her with talents. A love for others. A listening ear. A gentle heart. He has showered her with friends. He has provided for her needs. He has rescued her from difficulties. He loves her.

God has asked certain things of her. She knows it. But she struggles to obey.

I wonder why it’s so hard for her to obey. To do the simple things he’s asking of her. I’m so quick to judge. I think of what he’s asking of me. It’s also simple things.  Trust. Obey. He’s not asking me to move a mountain. Or to move to Timbuktu. He’s asking me to stay put when I look to move. Why can’t I just trust him when he says I’m equipped where I am? Why is it so hard for me? Why do I seek what isn’t best for me?

I know he loves me regardless of what I do or don’t do. He wants more of me than I think I can give.  All or nothing.  Hot or cold. Don’t be lukewarm. 
It sounds so easy. 

When did we start believing that God wants to send us to safe places to do easy things? That faithfulness is holding the fort? That playing it safe is safe? That there is any greater privilege than sacrifice? That radical is anything but normal? -Mark Batterson

He’s right. You know. God doesn’t ask us to play it safe in our relationship with him. He asks us to go deeper into knowing him. To move out of our comfort zone and really live through him. He wants us to go all in.

When we are powerless to do a thing, it is a great joy that we can come and step inside the ability of Jesus. -Corrie ten Boom

Why do I try to twist his request to suit my plans? Why do I stall for time hoping he’ll change his mind? Has God ever said that my ways are better than his?

But even more blessed are all who hear the word of God and put it into practice. Luke 11:28

What if Zacchaeus hadn’t climbed down from the tree when Jesus called him by name? Look at what he would have missed. This hated tax collector chose to come clean on the way he acquired his wealth and return money that wasn’t his. He chose to follow the unknown path of obeying Jesus.

What if the rich young man who was asked by Jesus to give up his wealth and comfortable life had actually obeyed? What other riches and blessings would he have received? He was already obeying the laws, but there was one thing he wasn’t doing. He willingly chose to keep his comfortable life instead of surrendering to Jesus. He’ll never know what he lost.

Comfort and complacency are never safe. It’s stagnant. It isn’t growth. I’m preaching to myself here.

Saying yes to God requires a sacrifice on my part. I will have to give up my comfort and convenience. But look what I gain. Perseverance. Growth. Peace. And so much more. I wonder what I’m giving up by choosing the path of comfort and convenience. Is it worth it? If I allow God to stretch me and use me as he wants, what can go wrong with that? Oh. I may be ridiculed. I may be mocked. I may be an outcast. I may be persecuted. But in the end I won’t lose.

Obedience. That’s the name of the game. Trust. That’s the art of letting go. Sounds so simple. So easy. But not knowing what’s ahead. What’s behind the door that’s ready to be opened. It can be daunting. It could be the best time of my life. And I’m willing to miss it just for the sake of playing it safe? Really? But I won’t know what’s on the other side of that door of obedience unless I walk through it.

Heavenly Assignment

~ mercyfortheday ~ 1 Comment

I was asked to take on a new client at the last minute. I knew the two owners, my employers, would also be on the conference call. Me. The newbie. Them. The experienced owners. No pressure.

So I took the little bit of time I had and prepared. I’m not the spontaneous type. I’m methodical. Calculated. Deliberate. I don’t normally do things on the fly. Oh. I do if I have to. But the fly doesn’t seem to go well for me. But I couldn’t say that. I couldn’t let them see me sweat. I couldn’t let them hear the nervousness I was feeling.

So I did the one thing I do. I prayed. I asked God to empower me with boldness. I asked him to enable me to calmly present the information. I asked him to equip me for the work ahead.

Faith in God is liberating. Faith allows God to do the work that my fears and worries would only stifle. And God came through for me. Instead of fear and nervousness, I was calm and relaxed.

Oh. The majority of the work is still ahead. But it will get done. There may be more long work days ahead. But the task is for me and I am equipped.

You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said. Luke 1:45

Mary heard the Angel’s message. You are favored. You will conceive and bear a son. You will name him Jesus. He will be the Savior of the world. I’m sure she was alarmed. I’m sure she felt inadequate. But she also felt called and blessed among women.

Mary didn’t whine or complain about the assignment from God. She accepted the call to be the mother of the God child. The angel had told her about her cousin, Elizabeth, who was pregnant at an old age. He said that the word of God will never fail. Nothing is impossible with God. And Mary accepted the news without a backward glance. She was all in. In spite of being outside her comfort zone. There was no turning back.

Mary spent some time with Elizabeth, who was also unusually pregnant at an advanced age.  Their boys would cause the world to stand up and take notice.   And Mary was thankful that God noticed her.

Oh. I haven’t been asked to bear the Son of God. But I have been noticed by God. He sees all that I do. He leads me in paths that I might not choose. But I choose to take the path where He leads. I’ve been asked to take on responsibilities that seem to stretch me every day. But I know God has led me there, so I’m all in. Regardless of the difficulty and unsettledness that others feel there, I am at peace.

Oh. The peace comes because I continue to ask God to help me. I continue to ask God to work in me and through me. And He does. Even though the angel hasn’t visited me, words of truth and comfort are whispered to me from the Lover of my Soul. So no matter the difficulty of the task I’ve been given, I am blessed because I believe the Lord will do what he says. Nothing is impossible with God.