Unearned Favor

We moved to a new state eleven months ago. This new state doesn’t have the bank where we have banked for our entire marriage. So, throughout the last months, we have been slowly moving checking and savings accounts to a new bank closer to home. It’s been a process. Stopping and restarting automatic payments and deposits. Hoping we haven’t forgotten any. I think we’ve finally crossed the finish line with the previous bank. Oh. We didn’t have any complaints with the former bank. We just needed a bank that was close to home. Not two states away.

We happened to be near a branch of the old bank a couple of weeks ago, so we stopped in to finally close out all the accounts. It was the end of an era. As we sat down with the bank manager, he pulled up our accounts. He calculated any interest that might be owed on the small amount we still had in the bank so he could produce a final check for us. And then he said the words we all hope to hear but usually don’t. Do you have another account? I told him that we had already moved our investment accounts, so no. There are no other accounts.

But lo and behold. There was an account in the name of the man of the house. It had sat dormant for many years. And the balance in that account blew us away. How could an account with that much money be forgotten and set aside? How does that happen? I don’t know. But it did.

I have to confess. As I sat there, I created in my mind a long list of ways to spend that wad of unknown money. We had hit paydirt. Oh no. Don’t get me wrong. We weren’t suddenly wealthy. But when you’re told you have a nice amount of money coming to you that you didn’t expect, you get a little excited. But I do have to admit that I sat there waiting for the shoe to drop. Would he discover that the account really wasn’t my husbands? Would the man have to come clean that what he thought was our account really wasn’t? But no. He didn’t. And we walked away with a lot more money than we had expected. It felt good to have that extra cash in our pocket.

What will we do with the money? You ask. I have no idea. Right now it’s sitting in a savings account accruing a very small amount of interest. But it’s ours, and it feels good. To be honest, I could have it spent in no time. Our new home has a host of updates that need to be made. Oh. We’re whittling down the list a little at a time, so every little bit of unplanned financial surprise is just that. A surprise.


Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. 1 Peter 4:10


Did you know that the word grace was used 124 times in the New Testament? And the apostle Paul used that same word 86 times in his writings. Grace is undeserved favor in God speak. And grace is getting something that we shouldn’t get without working for it. But God gives it to us without charge to us. Oh. There was a payment for grace. A huge sacrifice. Anyone who knows anything about the Bible knows that the sacrifice was God’s only Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus was crucified and died on a cross for the sins of every person who has ever had life. We didn’t have to ask for this favor. It was given to us freely. At least, it’s free for us. Someone did die for us to have that favor. And he did it willingly.

I think about the free gift of grace. It’s similar to the free money we discovered in a forgotten checking account. Oh. But this gift of grace is different.  It has eternal consequences.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

When I think of grace, I’m reminded of the neighbor who shoveled my driveway all winter.  And he asked if I minded if he did it.  And then another neighbor recently loaned us two window air conditioning units when our central air stopped working. They didn’t have to offer these acts of kindness to us, but they did it from the bottom of their hearts with no expectations of receiving anything in return. That’s what grace is. Good neighbors. Kind hearts. Acts of generosity.

Grace is an act of kindness we don’t expect or deserve.  It’s just given free of charge without any expectation of repayment.  So when the snow shoveling neighbor asked if we would mow his lawn while he was on vacation, you bet we said yes.  And when the air conditioning neighbor asked to use our water line and hose while he worked on a concrete project next door, you bet we agreed. 

God’s grace extends to everyone who calls on his name for salvation. We can also offer grace in a multitude of ways to those who need a helping hand or a favor. They may ask, but they may not. We can still offer a loving hand to help.

I remember the story of Jesus stopping to rest at a well outside of the town of Sychar in Samaria. He knew that a woman with a checkered past would come to the well in the heat of the day to draw water. She didn’t come with the masses of women during the cool morning hours, for fear of being rejected. She came alone when no one would be around. Except on this day, Jesus sat there waiting. He asked for water, and she was surprised at the request because he was Jewish. She knew Jews looked down on Samaritans. And then he offered her living water that would quench her thirst forever. She questioned how that was possible. So he told her of this living water that would change her life. And he continued on to tell her that he knew of her five husbands and that the man she currently lived with wasn’t her husband. He didn’t judge her or rebuke her. In love he offered her forgiveness and grace. Undeserved favor. And desperate for it, she gratefully accepted the invitation. And she ran and told the people of her town the good news.

Oh. Don’t be fooled. This woman from Samaria was very aware of the tensions between the Jews and her people. She knew exactly why Jews wouldn’t associate with people from her region, so she was very surprised when this obviously Jewish man sitting alone at the well asked her to get him a drink of water. She didn’t hesitate to serve him, but she had questions and he had the answer she didn’t know she needed.

You can read the story of the Samaritan woman at the well in John 4.

But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) Ephesians 2:4-5

Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. Romans 3:24

Did the bank manager, out of the goodness of his heart, just randomly offer us a sum of money that wasn’t owed us? Did the neighbor just randomly choose me out of thin air to shovel my driveway? Did the other neighbor happen to walk down the street and assume our air conditioning wasn’t working because our windows were open? No. The banker realized the money legally belonged to us, so he set the bank right with us. The neighbor shoveled our driveway because he knew I was living alone. The other neighbor offered the two air conditioners when I happened to mention our situation during a random conversation. These men used the gifts they had to serve those who were in need. Oh. They didn’t have to offer anything, but they did. And that’s exactly what Jesus Christ offers to anyone who comes to him. He offers forgiveness, grace and mercy. He will wipe our slate of sins clean when we confess and repent. He will make us a new person ready and willing to serve him. The least we can do is bow in submission and receive the free gift of salvation that he is offering.

Goodness Gracious

I don’t like to wait. I don’t like to be inconvenienced. I don’t like to be forgotten. I don’t like being lied to. I don’t like being cheated. I guess that I’m saying I’m selfish. I don’t want to be selfish,  but I like things my way. 

So, when I was standing in line at the grocery checkout, I had to decide. Would I show my annoyance or would I show grace. After all.  The person in front of me was trying to use a special coupon that the cashier couldn’t scan. Someone with more authority had to scan it, and they were struggling with getting the job done. I was silently sharing in that struggle.  And all I wanted to do was sigh loudly and glare. But I didn’t. I avoided eye contact and sighed inwardly. I berated myself for having such a poor attitude.

 So when the cashier thanked me for waiting, what was I supposed to say? No problem? But I was feeling like it was a problem.  And why? Where was I going that I was in such a hurry? My mask was hot, which makes me grumpy. I was hungry, and that makes me grumpy. What is my problem?

You each have the ability to let the words restore, inspire, soothe and build bridges instead of wound, separate or belittle. Let us pause before we speak, listen before we judge and stay curious, even when it hurts.

Darling Media

I admit it. I’m struggling. Just when I think I’m doing ok with all that has happened this year, something new comes along and sweeps me off my feet. And not in a good way.


The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. Psalms 103:8


In case you aren’t aware, there was recently a presidential election. There was a winner and there was a loser. Some say there was a definite winner and let’s move on. Others are challenging the results due to voter fraud and demand legal action. Someone has to be the winner and someone has to be the loser. In a race of two, that’s how the ball rolls. At this point, it seems both parties are losers.

Oh. I wasn’t a political candidate. I never will be. I’m not an athlete. I never will be. I’m not big on open competition. It just isn’t in my blood. But I do love to win. I admit it. I will be a fair weather fan if my favorite sports team is losing their game. If they can’t show up to play, I can’t show up to cheer them on. Call me a bad person. I’m not. But I don’t like it when things don’t go my way. Just being honest.

I’ve found that both the winner and the loser have a role to play once the results have been determined. The winner needs to win graciously. And the loser needs to lose graciously. Neither role is easy. One wants to gloat. Maybe it’s payback. Or pride. Or greed. Or finally my day has come. The other wants revenge. Or a second chance. An opportunity to prove the other wrong. Maybe it’s pride. Maybe they’re just a sore loser.

The telling is in how the winner and loser respond to the results. How does the winner win graciously? And how does the loser lose graciously?

It’s easy to spot idolatry in another. It’s very hard to be humble enough to see your own.

Mary DeMuth

I find I’m aging. I can tell it in the way my skin wrinkles. I can see it in the lines and creases in places that once were smooth. I know that if I can see it, others can too. But that’s the way life is. I can ignore it, but it won’t go away. I can pretend I look as youthful as I did 50 years ago. But it just isn’t the case.

I find grace is needed when it comes to aging. An acceptance of the way things were and the way things are and the way things will be. It’s not that things are ok. It’s just how it is. But I also find that there’s still time to make a difference. Gracefully, of course.

I find that when someone disagrees with me, I must be graceful in how I respond. Can I see their point of view, or is it my way or the highway? Can I accept their position in a kind, agreeable way? Can I respond in gentleness and fairness? Can I willingly hear what they’re saying and not judge?

Grace is a lesson to be learned. I find it’s a trial and error process. Oh. Being ungracious can be intentional. But so can being gracious.

We sat at lunch watching the young waiter. He didn’t seem to understand the idea of multitasking. He was able to complete only one task at a time. And it slowed down the entire lunch for the multiple tables he was serving. I heard him apologize more than once.

He seemed to be a nice young man. He was trying to do a good job. He was pleasant and kind. He was attentive when you had his attention. The trouble was that his attention was divided. I knew my patience had already been tested at the grocery store, so I decided I needed to take a deep breath and hold my tongue. Was it really that hard to do?

I don’t know what he is dealing with in his life. Maybe he’s trying to balance his school and work schedule. Perhaps he was struggling with wearing a mask all day while doing his job. Perhaps he has an upcoming midterm that he isn’t quite ready for. Or maybe he was assigned too many tables and just couldn’t manage his time well. There could be a multitude of reasons why he was struggling. Why not just give him a break?

I pray for God to envelop me with peace. I ask for his grace to overwhelm me as I consider the forgiveness I have received.  Now I must offer that same grace to the person who may challenge me. Or to the neighbor who stands opposed to my beliefs.

What are my intentions? What do I want to accomplish in the exchange? Am I willing to sever a friendship or a family relationship for many years to come just because I think I’m right? Is holding a grudge more important than gentle concern and kind humility? Is saying those harsh calculated words more important than my relationship with God? Am I willing to say those derogatory words in front of God? Because if I say them, then I’ve said them in front of God. 

Let’s be humble and kind, even when we don’t want to be. There are no regrets in that.

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Who are you wearing

It’s awards season.  The nominees have been announced.  They’ll get all fancied up.  For the event.  They’ll spend hours primping and priming and tucking and sleeking.  Hair is done.  Makeup is done.  Nails are done.  Nothing is left undone.  They must look their best.  The world will be watching.  Mostly from afar.

They’ve fasted.  They’ve dieted.  They’ve cleansed.  They’re as thin as they’re going to be.  For that night.

They’ve been offered the best of the best among the dresses.  The jewelry.  The shoes.  They must choose the attire they think will outshine everyone else.  For everyone else will be looking.  They will all be looking.  Hoping to win the best dressed award.  Which really isn’t an award.  It’s an opinion.  But opinions do matter.  Especially on this night.

I’ve watched the red carpet events for years.  Oh.  Not the actual awards shows.  But the shows as the gowns are being paraded down the red carpet.  The women pose.  First to the front with hand on hip.  Then flip out the leg if the slit is high enough.  And it is usually high enough.  Turn around to show off the back of the dress.  If the dress has a back.  Smile your brightest whitest smile.

They’re all waiting for the question.  The one question.  It’s a big question.  It’s asked at every event.  Supposedly made famous by Joan Rivers.  Who are you wearing?  That’s the question.  Oh.  It’s important.  It’s very important to give the designer’s name.  The name of the person who created the dress.  You see.  If someone rich and famous wears that designer’s clothes, then it’s assumed the rest of us will want to wear them.  Or knockoffs.  Whatever fits the budget.  Oh.  It’s a serious thing.  It’s a money maker.

But woe is the designer whose dress makes the worst dressed list.  As one show says.  One day you’re in.  The next day you’re out.  All because of other people’s opinions.

One particular event.  Every woman wore black.  They were making a statement.  They were taking names.  They were sharing a message.  With the color of their dress.  That event wasn’t so much about who they were wearing.  But it was about the color they were wearing.  Or weren’t wearing.  Fighting for a cause of their choice.  Daring others to join in or be called out.


And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.  Philippians 4:8


The way I see it.  I have a choice every day.  Every single day.  Which designer will I wear?  There are two designers to choose from.  Some may think two isn’t much of a selection.  Frankly.  One is all we need.  But we have a choice.  There’s an obvious difference in their designs.  In their taste level.  In their purpose.  And the choice makes a huge difference.  In everything.  One designer is the master creator.  The other is the master deceiver.

The master creator clothes us with truth.  Honor.  Respect.  Purity.  Love.  Grace.  And the price for all this. You ask.  There is no cost.  For us.  He paid a great price.  He gave his only son so we could be clothed in forgiveness.

The deceiver.  He clothes his followers with arrogance.  Deceit.  Murder.  Evil.  Wickedness.  Conflict.  Lies.
Oh.  The deceiver had his chance to work with the master designer.  But he wanted the top position.  It didn’t end well for him.  So he’s trying to trick anyone and everyone to wear his designs.  But don’t be fooled.  His designs come at a great price.
Just so you know.  Everyone is watching.  They’re listening.  They’re looking to see which designer you’ve chosen.  Is it easy to tell at first glance?  Do others ask for the name of your designer, because they like what they see?  Or are your knockoffs easy to spot?
So I dare to ask.  Who are you wearing?