accountability

The Fade

~ mercyfortheday ~ Leave a comment

It’s been in the news lately.  A couple of famous people have fallen off the sobriety wagon.  Oh.  They’re jumping back on, but now their private acts have been exposed.  The battle they’ve been fighting is still being fought but now out in the open.  Their worst private moments are made public.  They lost their way.  They had a tough year.  They gave in to the dark thoughts and desires within.

Oh.  It’s easy to point fingers and name names.  It’s easy to blame others’ problems on their lack of self-control or unknown weaknesses.  But I don’t know these people.  Except for what I read in the news.  I’ll never meet them.  I’ll never shake their hand.  I’ll never look them in the eye.  But what I do know is that the issues they’re facing can’t be faced alone.  They need others to help guide them and hold them accountable.  They need help.

They’ve had years of sobriety and great success.  They have been applauded and rewarded.  They have been the center of attention for a period of time.  But something happened.  Poor decisions.  Hard times.  Uncertainty.  Temptations.  Dark thoughts.  Who knows what caused the downfall.  They knew all the right things to do.  Go to meetings.  Be accountable.  Get help when things start to spin out of control.  But this time.  This time things were different.  The downward spiral started and before too long, they were too far gone to rescue themselves.  They no longer listened to the voice of reason within themselves or from those who wanted to help.  They got lost as they walked the path of sobriety.

I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.  Psalm 119:11

I read a story in the Bible about a nation called Israel.  They had a history of ups and downs in their relationship with God.  Oh.  Life was good when they kept God on their side.  But when they started to spiral downward.  And they did.  Life went out of control.  Their enemies came calling.  No.  It wasn’t social calls.  It was war.  All-out war.  Then when life became so unbearable, they remembered God.  Oh.  Yes.  God can help us.  They remembered.  When they allowed God in their lives and routines, He always came through.  He helped them win those battles.

During the times of forgetting God, the temple priests preached feel-good religion.  The priests quit reading the Bible to the people when they visited the temple.  The Bible got lost in the shuffle and wasn’t read for years.  Oh the joy when they found the Book.  When Josiah became king, he commanded the priests to dust it off and read it again.  Oh.  The change was real.  The king and his people repented and enjoyed peace in their land and in their homes and hearts.  But when Josiah died, the people forgot God and went back to their old ways.

It makes me wonder.  What happens in our lives and homes when we don’t read the Bible?  When we put the Bible on the shelf to accumulate dust?  How long does it take for us to forget God’s commands and promises?  How long before we begin to ignore God’s calling and will for our lives?  How long before we no longer talk about God to our children and families?

What do we turn to during our times of trouble if we’re not turning to God and his Word?  What stumbling block is in our path if we don’t keep the path to God clear and uncluttered?  Who will hold us accountable when we start down the slippery slope?

How does it happen?  It’s not an overnight change.  It’s gradual.  A slow move to accepting.  Or thinking.  Or acting in ways you once thought repulsive.  A giving up.  A letting go of values.  Beliefs.  To accepting the viewpoint you once disapproved.  The gradual release of convictions.  Of letting inhibitions go.

How do we go back?  How do we return to our first love?  How do we get back on the road of redemption?

Oh God.  Forgive us for not faithfully reading and studying your Word.  The lifeline to you.  We’ve forgotten it and moved to thinking that being good is good enough.  But really.  The Good Book needs to be dusted off and placed in the center of our lives.

I See You

~ mercyfortheday ~ Leave a comment

I know this guy.  Honestly.  I don’t know him well.  But I know enough.  I’ve never felt comfortable around him.  I can’t really pinpoint the reason, but it’s there.  Hiding behind the façade of friendliness.  I see inconsistencies in him.  I hear the words he says.  I see the look he gives.  I know what he does.  He’s fighting something.  He’s facing a storm within.

The fight looks familiar.  It feels like it fits.  I think the inconsistency I see in him is the one I’m trying to hide in myself.  The thing that bothers me is the flaw I see in him is what I don’t want others to see in me.  But I see it in him.  Is it because his flaws are similar to mine?  If he can’t hide his, then what are the chances mine are hidden?  Who is seeing my flaws?  Do they judge me as I’m judging him?

Oh.  It’s not my intention to judge him.  But if I’m honest.  Really honest.  I’m judging.  I want to call out his narrow-mindedness, while I shove mine down.  Hoping no one sees.

What inconsistencies do others see in me?  Who do I think I’m fooling?

I wouldn’t call him out publicly by name.  I wouldn’t do that.  But I watch.  Hoping he’ll change.  Hoping I’ll change.  So maybe the one who’s watching me sees change in me.  I’m trying.  Perhaps he’s trying, too.  I like to think he’s trying.

I don’t know his history.  I don’t know what caused his attitude and his faults.

Instead of focusing on his flaws, why don’t I look for his strengths? His gifts?  His talents?  They’re easy to spot.  If you know him.  If you see him in action.  And his career is pretty spectacular.  He works to make people’s lives better.  That has to be a good feeling.  Why not praise him for those things instead of tear him down for his imperfections?  Why is it so much easier to focus on those annoyances?

If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth.  But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.  If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.   1 John 1:8-10

I look at my faults.  My flaws.  The inconsistencies in my life that I try to keep hidden.  Oh.  I know God sees them.  He knows them.  He lets me know he sees them.  And asks me to do something about it.  He wants me to change.

Someone recently told me one of the faults they see in me.  They didn’t call it a fault.  They just let me know that’s how they see me.  They believe it to be truth.  I was left trying to figure out why they think that of me.  It’s interesting, humbling and eye-opening to hear others describe you to your face.  Sometimes their critiques are correct.  Other times, their words make me stop and examine myself.

Maybe I’ve been denying the truth.  Maybe I’ve been so blind that I can’t see my own faults.

Reuben Welch once said that we really do need each other.  And we do.  We need to hold each other accountable.  We need to encourage each other.  We need to stand with each other.  We need to pray for each other.  We need to love each other.

The book of 1 John was written to a group of believers who weren’t getting along.  John was asking them to be better.  To be together.  Not against each other.  It takes work on both sides.  We can see each other’s flaws and still get along.