Lately I’ve been stewing. A lot. Stewing about a situation that has become intolerable. It’s frustrating. It’s uncomfortable. It’s maddening. I am struggling. I don’t get angry very often. It takes a lot to make me mad. But lately. Lately I find myself angry more often than not. And I don’t like it. I’m not an angry person. I don’t carry grudges. But sometimes others’ injustices and inconsistencies get the best of me.
I find myself not wanting to be in that place. But I must. I must go there. I must face the situation every day. I find myself wanting to run away. To move to a place where I can escape the trouble. To a place where I can breathe and feel whole again. It’s not time to do that, though. Not yet.
The thing is. God knows my discomfort. He sees it. He says stay. He says I will be safe. So I stay. So I pray. I face each new day knowing he is with me. Knowing he won’t leave me.
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 2 Corinthians 4:17
I’ve read that Satan roams the earth. He’s looking to cause trouble. He looks for people he can devour. He searches for Christ followers who he can trick into following him. He slyly convinces people to do things his way. He pretends to be someone else. He is Satan.
God’s eyes also roam the earth. He’s looking to give strength to his faithful people. He’s constantly observing everyone on the earth to see what they’re doing. He can see the entire human race all at the same time. He isn’t a magician. He is God. He is omnipotent. He can be everywhere all at once. I know he sees me.
I wonder whose eye I’ve caught with my light and momentary troubles.
Have I caught Satan’s eye? Is he stirring the pot? Is he causing trouble where trouble shouldn’t be? Is he tormenting me and winning? Is he trying to convince me to do things his way?
Is God watching over me? Is he testing me? Is he allowing this friction, so it will pull me even closer to him? To strengthen my faith and trust in him?
Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in his wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of his glory and grace
As I think of the words of this old hymn, I realize I need to keep my eyes on Jesus. I need to keep the faith. I need to choose my battles. I need to stay in the word of God and trust. I need to trust God. As I do that, the things of this earth will grow dim. They pale in comparison to my future in heaven. Those things, whether they’re good or bad. They are momentary.